Something Uplifting

Even if the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, consider this. 
Your neighbor has spent many hours irrigating, fertilizing, mowing, trimming, and watering the lawn.  In fact, they have spent so much time maintaining their luscious, green yard carpet, that they neglected their wife and children. 
Lets call the children Sam, and Sam.  One is a boy, Samuel, and the other is a girl, Samantha.  When the lawn was slightly more brown, they were decent students, polite, and generally responsible.  Let's call your neighbor Stan.  Now one day Stan got a wild hair up his ass and thought, "you know, I want a nicer lawn."  So he went to the Home Depot and bought 300 pounds of shi- I mean fertilizer, a quarter acre of sod, a Lawn Tool 3000, a truckload of mulch, a bunch of that fabric crap you put under your sod so weeds don't grow through, and a bunch of weed killing chemicals.  He spent approximately the equivalent of two years of community college. 
When he got his lawn improvement materials home and out of the bed of the Tundra, he went to work.  He worked from the time he got off his job at the milk plant until dinner.  He did this for three years straight, obsessing over the level of green in his grass.  He panicked when it hailed, dragging the tarp that once covered his late father's Triumph TR6 out to protect his precious lawn.  Meanwhile, his once kind and respectful children got in with the wrong crowd.  Daddy didn't pay any attention to them anymore, so Sam and Sam became rebels.  They went to parties, filled with questionable individuals and performed questionable acts. 
But daddy's lawn was still green. 
Meanwhile, Stan's wife, Sandra went with a bunch of girlfriends to see Magic Mike.  This caused her to have turned on-ish qualities.  When she got home, she asked Stan to "go upstairs."  But Stan was in the middle of programming his sprinkler system to realize what she was talking about.  After a year or so of being ignored, Sandra turned to the bottle.  She became best friends with her good friends Chianti and Merlot.  Sandra spiraled into depression and gained weight.
But Stan's lawn was still green.
Next time you think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, remember how much shit your neighbor put into it.
Now go sit in that spot of your lawn with all the goat heads.