Should I Give the Person Next to Me, Crotch or Butt??

Written by T-Rod

Men are faced with many decisions in their life.

Whether or not to root for your hometown football team, or the team in the city or state you grew up in. Or what size TV/home system to get based on the dimensions of the room, as well as how well the room resonates sound. Well, when on an airplane or in a movie theater; a guy always has a BIG

decision to make when exiting the seat row. 

"Should I give the person next to me crotch or butt?" 

There a few different situations that will help decide this.

1st: Is it a man or woman? If it is a woman you always give them crotch, just because you

don't want to walk with your backside to them and then accidentally fart in their face.

2nd: Is there enough room to walk straight out? If there is, then do it.

3rd: Is everyone standing? This can go one of two ways: 1) you can walk on the seats

behind the people, or 2) they know you are exiting the row, so they will turn their body

sideways, so nothing is faced with another. This is the most ideal situation if a person is

next to you.

4th: Is it a child? If so, give them butt. Kids like to hit things, so make sure it ain't the crotch.

5th: Is he a man? And if so is he standing or sitting? If the man is standing (this is the

most difficult situation), walk by him facing him directly, with one hand in front of your crotch.

Of course, do not make it obvious, as that draws attention to that area. If he is sitting, walk out

facing away from him. This maneuver is dangerous, and also the second most difficult,

because if you fall, you might end up sitting on his crotch. To properly do this maneuver,

make sure you have a firm grip on the chairs in front of you. That way, in case you fall, you can

catch yourself before you fall onto his lap.

6th: Most Ideal Situation(s)?? These situations require no thought or skill in order to

exit the seat row. 1) No one is in the seat row with you. This is most ideal, as there is

no worry of any face-to-lower body stares, and 2) this is an ideal situation, but can still

warrant a quick and skilled response. You are on the end seat, but other people are in the

row. See below for this situation.

7th: When sitting on the end chair, are there other people in the row? If the answer is yes, you

are faced with a situation. What if those people need to exit the row? If they do, make

sure your face does not come into contact with their lower body. These people might not

always follow the above advice, so be careful. Keep your head either face down or turn

your head to the side opposite they are going. This way there is no chance of accidental

face crotch. If you are standing, just turn to the side and let them pass.

So there my advice of the day; I Hope U Hate It, and Fail in Your Attempts at Applying

it!!!!